Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Joining the twenty-first century

I have to thank my sister Kat for prodding me into this effort. I was pleased to see that there were no photos on Google Images of me, so I'll be providing a photograph via scanner, I think (that's another avenue of technology I am presently insufficiently aware of).

However, I am up to speed on the conduct of the corporate-owned government, or so I do flatter myself, and it is in that spirit that I offer the following imaginary

Omnibus Antifascist and Democracy Restoral act of 2008:

(cornet fanfare in A Major, flat seven)

Be it resolved by the People of the United States in Congress Assembled, that

The Bill of Rights, the Ten Amendments appended to the Constitution
of the United States, are reaffirmed as supreme Constitutional Law in
the United States, and are not now nor ever to be superseded by mere
legislative corruptions such as the Patriot Act, nor any Emergency
Declarations by the President or others; nor shall the freedoms and
rights enshrined in the Bill of Rights be diminished or replaced by
misguided contradictions, as one might find in the Warren Defense Act,
the Sedition Act, the Homegrown Terrorism Act, or any other inferior
document or Presidential decree. The War on Terror is disbanded as an
agent of deception and corruption, and shall not be used as further
excuse for any acts of imperialism, repression or fascism. The
Separation of Powers enshrined in the Constitution remains in effect,
and thus immediately reverses all Wars not declared by Congress, and
removes any President not elected by a vote of the People, and any
Agency not dedicated to the Freedom and Welfare of the American
People. All Secret Police agencies are now disbanded and rendered
null and void, and all Prisons held for the purpose of intimidating
enemies and dissenters are now to be emptied and immediately
destroyed. All Funding of the US government shall be appropriated by
the House of Representatives in the manner prescribed by the
Constitution, and no Secret Funding will be allowed.

As the Preamble to the Constitution directs, the Government of the
United States is and shall remain in service to all of the People of
the United States and in no wise may be construed to exist for the
benefit of mere Corporations. Furthermore no Corporation shall be
granted unnatural rights or status similar to that of natural Persons.

There. That should set some things right. Now wouldn't you prefer that your legislatures work on stuff like that, rather than on the Thoughtcrime Act ( Violent Radicalization and Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act) or the Hooray for Christmas Act?

(Here's a link that I'll try pasting in 21st-Century Style (ohh me back narrr!))


(Did it work?) This Act is still cooking and would criminalize you and me and the NAACP lunch counter sitters.


I'm not doing my KBOO show this week 'cause I have to take an employment test.

If you want a copy of my book JEEZUS!, you're out of luck. You should have pledged! Oh wait, that's a BIG FAT LIE and in fact all you have to do is go to the self-publisher website lulu.com and type my name and/or the book name into the search bar, and then pay them to have a copy shipped to you; or else you can find me personally (lots of luck) and see if one of the six remaining copies in my possession is still available; or you can procrastinate still further, because I'm (nervously) going to try to punch little buttons on this 'puter until some sort of advertisement appears for it on this blog. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee

theresa mitchell

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

And she's off!

Thanks for starting the blog, sis. Now remember to post in it every day so it doesn't get lonely, and hungry, and then decide it doesn't recognize you, and then go back to an egg.

(Oh wait, that's a neopet. Never mind. . .)

Anyways, looking forward to reading you daily!